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May 28, 2021

How to handle conflicts in relationships

Dear valued customer,

There’s a universal truth when it comes to relationships: conflict will happen.

This applies to any relationship. Siblings, spouses, co-workers, neighbors, partners, and teammates all experience conflict from time to time. It’s not a matter of IF a conflict will appear—it’s merely a question of WHEN.

And whether it will be addressed or avoided.

Generally speaking, people can be placed into one of two categories when it comes to conflict: those who address the conflict at hand and those who avoid the conflict at hand.

Which are you? [And why does it matter?]

Those who address conflict

Let’s be clear: the person we’re describing in this first category does not CREATE the conflict, but addresses it.

Big difference.

Remember, conflict is going to surface on its own in any relationship. When the person in this first category becomes aware of the conflict, they are compelled to talk about it with the other party as soon as possible. Until the conflict is addressed, this person remains unsettled with a sense that they’ve left something important unfinished.

If it’s a spouse, for example, this person will not be able to fall asleep before addressing the conflict. It’s this person who wakes their spouse at midnight to talk because their attempts to fall asleep while the conflict remains unresolved have repeatedly failed.

On the one hand, this person deserves our respect because they “run toward the danger” by initiating potentially uncomfortable conversations in an attempt to resolve conflict in their relationships. On the other hand, a word of caution is appropriate so that an effective process is followed.

Doing what they do naturally—addressing conflict—may result in escalation if this person isn’t careful in how they approach the issue. They should be cautious not to attempt to resolve conflict prematurely just to get it behind them. And they should also be mindful not to fuel the existing conflict with forthright, unfiltered words.

Those who avoid conflict

In this category is the spouse who is sleeping soundly at midnight when the other wakes them because, in this person’s view, falling asleep is a welcome escape from the existing conflict.

This person is often slower to become aware of the conflict (or less inclined to acknowledge it), and they push it quickly to the back of their mind where they hope it will stay buried and unaddressed. That’s because talking through the conflict—regardless who’s at fault—is terribly uncomfortable for them. They would rather pretend that no conflict exists than undergo the painful process required to resolve it.

And we all know that’s not healthy.

If it’s a genuine conflict—and I think we’ve established that even the healthiest relationships have genuine conflict from time to time—then working through the issues toward some form of resolution is better for both parties long term.

This person who naturally avoids conflict must go against their instincts to properly address the elephant in the room. Avoiding conflict, after all, doesn’t make it go away. To the contrary, unaddressed conflict usually festers and grows.

Among siblings, spouses, co-workers, neighbors, partners, and teammates.

Our partnership with you

We view our relationship with you as a partnership. And as your partner, we strive to offer you more than what you might receive from a mere outsourcing provider.

And that includes our response to conflict.

In the rare instance when things go wrong in a business relationship such as ours, a partner will proactively problem solve—regardless of where the blame rests. Should such a rare and unfortunate example occur between us, we aspire to assume responsibility, take corrective action, learn from any such experience, and establish processes to prevent recurring instances across all of our customer relationships.

As you can see, our relationship with you matters and you remain at the center of everything we do. Thank you for partnering with us and for placing your trust in OSV.

Jeff Miller

Global Brand Marketing and Communications Director

About OneSource Virtual

OneSource Virtual (OSV) is the Workday partner that has helped more than 1,300 companies with everything from deployment to maintenance to payroll and more—all to make the day more doable. Founded in 2008, OSV pioneered Business Process as a Service (BPaaS) and has become the leading provider of automated solutions for organizations of all sizes using Workday, delivering services with unparalleled choices, unwavering commitment, and uncompromising care. OneSource Virtual’s global headquarters is located in Dallas, Texas, with additional locations across North America and Europe. OneSource Virtual: let’s make the day more doable. Find your company’s solution at www.onesourcevirtual.com.